Avoid doing this very creepy move as a man
Never this is very creepy move as a man
There’s certain things you might be doing that you think are friendly, when they’re actually creepy. Here’s a story I recently heard:
A girlfriend of mine has a colleague visiting her office this week. She noted two things this guy does that’s been giving her the ick. In case you don’t know what “ick” is, it’s when someone gives you a feeling of disgust.
The first thing this guy does is touch her too much. A tap on the arm. Placing his hand on her shoulder. Almost every time they talk, he goes in for a touch.
She doesn’t view this as sexual harassment or him trying to cop a feel. This guy is touching everyone, she said. The old receptionist lady, other guys, and so on. He thinks it’s a friendly and warm way to interact with people. But he goes for a touch every single time he’s talking to someone.
The first rule is to have boundaries. Understand that most people do not want to be touched. If you’re not sure if someone wants to be touched, you’re better off not exploring their comfort level. Just keep your hands to yourself. This is the safer move.
Stop trying so hard
The other thing this guy does is he walks into other people’s cubes and says “How’s it going? Everything okay? Can I get you anything?” He walks into her cube and does that about three times per day. Again, he does this with other men in the office too.
This move is reeking of desperation to be liked by others. Therefore the second rule here is give people space. It’s off putting for someone to ask if you need something or if you’re okay multiple times in a day.
I knew one couple who are now broken up. When they would hang out with others, the guy would look at his girlfriend and say “babe, you okay?” He did this like twice every hour while we were all with a group. It was very annoying to witness. You do not need to be checking up on people so often. It gets awkward fast.
More bad moves to avoid
There’s things you’re doing right now on dates that can be perceived as creepy and awkward without even knowing.
Here’s a short list:
- Always diverting the conversation back to you. This is really more in line with being narcissistic but it gives off the same effect as being creepy or awkward. Meaning, people simply want to be around you less.
- Always bringing up money and advertising how cheap you are. We get it, the economy isn’t ever perfect but constantly being a cheapo will make people like you less.
- Inappropriate jokes and making sexual jokes around people you don’t know well. When it comes to humor, you have to really read the room. You have no idea what the tolerance level of other people are.
- Constant sarcasm. A sarcastic line here & there is okay. But if your personality is nothing but sarcasm, people will not find that endearing.
- Not dressing correctly. When you’re overdress or undressed, or you just look like a mess, it adds an air of awkwardness to the room.
My suggestion to avoid being creepy? Find someone who’s a real people person. Mimic them. See what they’re doing right and what they avoid.
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